Domestic violence and restorative practices

A national focus

Across Australia this week, there has been a strong focus on domestic violence.

The Hitting Home series on ABC TV together with the associated Q&A special provided a wealth of material for reflection and discussion.

For me, the strong but understated implication of the programs was the desperate need for 

• Social and emotional development of the perpetrators (and victims)
• Repair of the harm done to the victims (and perpetrators)

How much of the problematic behaviour in schools is the product of child abuse and domestic violence? Much more than is generally acknowledged.

In the Q&A program there was a report of the recent initiatives to move from reactive police after the event, to preventative policing before more harm is done.

Schools can play a powerful long-term role in preventing further domestic violence by embedding restorative practices to

• repair harm already done
• make expectations explicit - everyone needs to know and agree what is acceptable
• build community that  supports both victims and potential perpetrators*
• enable the social and emotional development of all members of the school community.

(* I have always believed that being a bully is bad for the bully)

I wrote about Breaking the Cycle of Family Violence a few months ago. This week has only re-enforced the need to maintain every effort possible.

It is not about Restorative Practices

It is not about Restorative Practices per se

To paraphrase this profound GapingVoid cartoon:

Restorative practices are not the thing. It is the person, family, home, team, class, school, community... that you build with restorative practices that are the real thing.

Restorative practices/justice are a powerful set of strategies and tools but they have no value in themselves. Their value lies in enabling  ordinary people to

• Resolve often serious problems 
• Repair harm done
• (Re-)build relationships and 
• Build the "community".

And this is why the Social Discipline Window is at the core of Restorative Practices. 

Building relationships and community cannot be done TO or FOR the people involved. And it won't happen is no-one gets involved. 

To build a "house" (community) it necessary to work WITH the people involved. This means providing the necessary Support and Challenges that are embedded in all Restorative Practices.